If you’re a dad who’s ever stood in a men’s toilet looking for a changing table and found nothing, you’re not imagining it. There genuinely isn’t one in a lot of places. There’s no legal requirement for venues to install changing facilities in men’s toilets in the UK, and a huge number of them simply haven’t bothered.
A poll by The Dad Network found that nearly half of UK dads have changed a baby in the back of the car. One in ten had to use the floor of a public toilet. These aren’t edge cases. This is just what it’s like.
Nobody designed these places with you in mind
The assumption, for a very long time, has been that nappy changing is something mothers do. So the changing table went in the women’s toilets, and the men’s got nothing. Some venues have started to update this, but a lot haven’t, and you often have no way of knowing until you’re already there with a situation developing.
It’s frustrating, but knowing it’s a systemic problem rather than just bad luck at this specific Costa is at least mildly useful.
14% of primary caregivers are dads, venues haven’t caught up
Around 14% of primary caregivers in the UK are fathers. That’s a significant number of people who are out every day with babies and toddlers, trying to find somewhere to change them. Blogger Al Ferguson and a campaign backed by Sudocrem ran the #dadsforchange push a few years ago to highlight exactly this, and while awareness has grown, the facilities haven’t kept pace.
More venues are including changing tables in both sets of toilets now, particularly newer builds and recently refurbished chains. But you’re still rolling the dice at a lot of places, particularly older pubs, independent cafes, and smaller shops.
The accessible toilet is your best friend
The most reliable workaround is the accessible toilet. Most venues that have any changing facilities at all will have them in the accessible loo, which is usually shared between men and women. If you can’t find anything in the men’s, ask at the counter. More often than not, someone will point you to the accessible toilet or unlock it for you.
It’s not a perfect solution, and you should always check that nobody genuinely needs it first. But in practice, this is how most dads navigate it day to day.
How to scope out a place before you get there
Chain restaurants and coffee shops are generally more reliable than independent venues. Places like Costa, McDonald’s, and Wetherspoons have made efforts to put changing facilities in accessible or shared toilets. It’s not guaranteed, but you’re more likely to find something.
If you’re going somewhere unfamiliar, a quick call ahead can save a lot of hassle. Just ask if they have a changing table and whether it’s in the men’s or a shared facility. Most places won’t think twice about the question.
Bigger shopping centres almost always have a dedicated family room that anyone can use regardless of gender. If you’re planning a longer outing, anchoring your route around a shopping centre or large supermarket is a reasonable strategy.
You shouldn’t have to work this hard, but here’s a shortcut
The reality is that until more venues catch up, you’re going to have to plan around this. Clover shows baby changing locations near you and can help you spot which places have facilities before you leave the house. It’s a bit of a workaround for a problem that shouldn’t exist, but it beats changing your baby on the floor of a pub toilet.